"So much in life depends on our attitude. The way we choose to see things and respond to others makes all the difference. To do the best we can and then to choose to be happy about our circumstances, whatever they may be, can bring peace and contentment."
While it is true, it is definitely the most difficult thing I have ever had to do in my life. The past nearly two years have been full of so much up and down and turmoil, I often times find myself looking out the window, wishing to fly, wishing to breathe again wishing for nothing but a moment of solace and sweet, silent, happiness.
Creating my own happiness has been an amazing experience. I recently read a book about Stalin's occupation of Lithuania and the subsequent removal of the Lithuanian people. While the book was fiction, so much of it was written from real life experiences. My heart ached for these people, and yet the book was written from the perspective of a 15 year old girl, who knew that without the choice of happiness she would never survive. That is how it is with us in this day, in our circumstances. I have it so much better than this girl did. I have nothing to complain about. Truly I do not. So, why do I still?
Because even though we are finding happiness, circumstances still suck. I am still greatly sad. I still suffer from debilitating depression like I have had for the past two days. It is hard to overcome at times and see that the big picture may turn out differently than I see it during these dark moments.
I have been feeling angry lately. I know where anger comes from...I know what its effects are on me, on my spirit, on my body. I hate being angry. Anger is such a powerful emotion. There is so much I want to spew, but I am choosing to endure it silently, to get through it, let it wash over me like a wave and hope for a better day. I know it will subside. I know it will be gone soon, I don't want it to waste me away like I have seen it do. Life is too short, this time too precious.
Sorry for my emotional vomitous post. (Vomitous is not a word, yet I still like it.) I just need to reaffirm that I can get through this. Good things are in store. I am so very very blessed. As in, truly, seriously, blessed.
How do you remember to choose happiness when it gets hard?
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